Tag Archives: loss

Sleeping With Supergirl

YOLO, you only live once is the motto.

Heaven, the good book says it is easier for a camel to go through a needle (hole) than for man to go/to get to heaven.

Heaven, a place we all fantasize about. A place not everyone believes in but a place everyone wants to go to.

Earth, there’s no telling if what we have here is anything like the afterlife. Yea, we can’t be certain if the relationships, the people we hold so dearly will be part of our picture on the other side. If we’ll share the same connections, the same love as we do here, though one can only be faithful as having faith promises such possibilities.

Earth, a place where we all have responsibilities, amongst these responsibilities, none is greater than parenthood.

Yes, life happens, we give, we take, we forgive, we forget… Well, not all the time. Especially when something happens to our daughter or son… No matter how old they may get the sense of responsibility towards them never fades. With every little scratch, every fall they take we unquestionably crucify ourselves for not stopping it, for looking away for that mili second long enough for that tragedy to happen.

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Tears In Heaven… Is that even possible?… Who knows?… Here on Earth, it is the parent who tells the child what’s safe and what isn’t, it’s the parent who stops the child from climbing or trying to climb the cupboard… With parents left back on Earth, who will tell the baby that heaven is a good place? That it’s safe? That there is no need to cry?

Losing his four-year old son Conor who tragically fell from a window of a 53rd floor New York apartment building owned by his mother’s friend. Clapton went to his music for comfort, “Tears In Heaven” came to life. The song would go on to earn him 6 of his 18 Grammy Awards.

After losing a loved one, we find solace in the idea of seeing them again on the other side… Trying to console our soul, we dwell in the idea, hoping for brighter days, we picture it… But when one can’t help but somewhat feel like they could’ve done something to prevent the death, we start to wonder if the trust will still be there… if the love will still be there… If we deserve it…

 

Would you know my name

If I saw you in heaven

Would it be the same

If I saw you in heaven

 

A child is nothing but a child, they know no wrong, they do no wrong but learn… It only makes sense that heaven is their only destination. When a parent is blaming himself/herself for their child’s short life, hell is all they can feel inside. They can never forget nor forgive themselves.

Dooming himself to hell, Clapton is imagining a brief encounter with his late son in a spirit world…

 

I must be strong

And carry on

‘Cause I know I don’t belong

Here in heaven

 

Such an iconic number. Do yourself a favour and listen to “Tears In Heaven” by Eric Clapton today… Oh well, whatever, nevermind

 

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The 10th Daily Bread

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You’re a canary, I’m a coal mine cos sorrow is just all the rage, turn a blank page, scribble in rage, age is years, sorrow is tears, time can never be borrowed, pain never narrowed, it grows, it goes, it comes back, defence we lack, the fence gets higher, guarded, once again victims we fall, young again we crawl, grounded, we learn, eternal happiness we yearn, mere mortals we are, mere mortals we are, human days can only take us so far.

Loss, in bed we toss, friends, lovers, family, they live, they believe, well, believer or not, one thing we never have to debate is our flesh, its fate. A ticking time bomb, one of these days the heart is bound to play its final beat, lifeless, it will stop, the eyes will close as pain devours anyone who cares enough to listen.

My immortal, your immortal, haunted by what once was, what would’ve been, what can never be. Facing a loss, a loss you can never compensate, a hole, a void tears can temporarily fill, only to be evanesced. The person is no more, alive or not, they are no longer with you (at least physically) though their presence is everliving in your conscience, your thoughts, your mind. It possesses you, it consumes you.

I’ve chosen to convey a less explored facet of this song through the eyes of a young widow. Recently widowed, she is still trying to get a hang of things, from sleeping next to her late husbands side of the bed, to no longer having the kind of conversations she’d have with him, and of course,to having to raise the kids alone.” You used to captivate me by your resonating light, Now I’m bound by the life you left behind”. Bound to playing “Dad” to their now fatherless kids, bound to the life she created with him, bound to constantly being reminded of him where ever she lays her eyes. In her conscience, a permanent resident he resides, a painful reminder of what could’ve been. He is her immortal.